eat bacon from a can, just like the stars

last night after the chi alpha bible study and the weekly trip here, three of us decided to go to clay's house to see this. i had no idea what joy lay ahead of me. we walked in, and at first it seemed like a pretty ordinary house...until clay started digging out the, shall we say, aged food? (make "aged" italicized in your minds, i don't know how to use this mac). jell-o, sandwich bags, relish, these, canned clams, you name it, and all from circa 1950. we headed toward the garage and clay told us that his aunt and uncle (who own the house) own one of these and my already-high excitement tripled because it's one of my biggest dreams to own one one day. but it was too dark to see in so we continued on to the garage and found some old ballot boxes, golf clubs, more typical garage fare. then clay came running around the corner, yelling "i found us a flashlight," and furiously started turning the crank on the, yep, manpowered device. we tried to shine it in the windows of the airstream, but the power would only last about 4 seconds, so we settled for using my cell phone. but the fun was just beginning. it was on to the bedrooms next, where clay showed us this, among other things. but the best was still yet to come...the BASEment!!! the stairway is shingled, yes, shingled. that is, on the walls going down there are shingles, and the hand"rail" is a rope. once you reach the bottom you are greeted by a ferocious, mardi gras-esque wall hanging of a tiger. directly to the right of that is this: a leather horse and a pool table surrounded by a border made of oversized playing cards and felt dice with a felt background, so the dice can be moved like biblical characters from a sunday school story. words cannot describe my happiness upon entering this room.
red shag carpet not only on the floor, but on the wall under the bar and on the poles as well. if you ask me, nothing says party like this,, especially when it comes complete with these! but the biggest downer of the evening, the real buzzkill was when we stumbled across this. pesky stradiuvarii are always getting in the way of real (again, italics please) treasures. have fun in france, clay. you will be missed!